Wednesday, Feb 5, 1890 Bright and warm with a brisk N. W. wind later in the day. Awoke feeling very badly with a shortness of breath and a generally discouraging feeling but felt better after breakfast, partly owing I fancy to indigestion. Went through Crosbys new house which is plastered and nearly finished. He has splendid views in all directions. They are at work on the roof of the Jones house. Came away by the 4.05 train. Johnson was just coming in with a load of wood as I came away, only the second one he has been able to bring this winter owing to bad roads. Joe Cornell and his son came on the train and Joe and I sat together a good part of the way and talked. He told me Sam and Mr. Cornell did not get on at all smoothly and I imagine they have very unpleasant business relations. Joe blamed Sam and thought he ought to be more patient with the Major. Went to the Century and got my dinner and came to my room early with a somewhat lonely feeling and wishing I were at our pleasant fireside at home. There is so little stimulus or encouragement for American artists that life in the city now that I am getting towards old age that I long for the peace and quiet and seclusion of home. Still I think it best to be here at least for a time but I look forward to going home before many years to spend my days. Found a letter from Wilkinson wanting me to go on the trip to the North Woods in May but I think I will not attempt it, for one reason--I cannot afford it and I fear also it will be more of an effort than I can make unless I grow stronger.
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