Monday, May 30, 1887 Decoration day. I was to have met with the soldiers Monument Committee at the City Hall to take part in the Memorial exercises but I wrote Col. Tremper a note telling him I was disabled and could not be present. I have been very lame today and with great difficulty control my left leg. Sara encourages me to think it is only the result of a cold but I am afraid it is permanent paralysis. I am dazed by it and know not how to accept so great and so unexpected an affliction. I can only hope I may recover from it although I am worse today. I had a letter from Mary Gifford and one from Bispham to whom I sent for Booths address and a notice of an outing by the Artists Mutual Aid Society on June 2nd. Girard acted as one of the aids today.