Friday, Jan 23, 1885 The weather still bitterly cold. I work away and see no one. I might almost as well be in Kamschatka. Rock sent a man for the balance of his bill $38. The bills always come when one is particularly not ready for them. I have a desperate feeling but I work and try not to think of my troubles. Marion had her party this evening. She asked me to come but I do not feel like being among young people bent on enjoyment. I came regretfully to my room after dinner, feeling most deeply the need of sympathetic companionship, and deciding to be alone, yet without the courage to be in a throng. I wrote to Laura, or rather copied the letter I wrote up home last Sunday in which I tried to show my sympathy with her and to soften the unfriendly feelings they all harbor toward us. Then about ten oclock I went to the club where I saw Perry and Champney. I spoke to Perry about my plan of having pupils. He thought I would be sick of it as I dare say I will. He said I could just as well get $200 a month as $100 and I think now of asking $500 for the three months.