Monday, Jan 12, 1885 Mary Waldo went home this forenoon. There were fine effects of sky as the rain cleared up, but I had a sad discouraged feeling at home, a sense of great changes impending over us which turned my thoughts to dear Gertrude and the rest of our beloved ones who have left us. When I went out into the hall to go to my room a peculiar odor that I must have known years ago awoke a thousand tender memories and tearful recollections. I am sad and troubled and cant help questioning the future and wondering what still sadder experiences are ahead of us. I came down in the noon train and had the mortification and disappointment to find that one of my small pictures, a ["]Kaatskill brook" has been rejected by the Boston Art Club after soliciting me for pictures. I feel now that I shall never send there again. This little incident does not lessen my discouragement. Calvert and I called upon Mrs. Pumpelly at the Brevoort house. I had not seen her in many years. She is a very beautiful woman though much changed since I last saw her. From there we went to the club when we met Weir on his way to Bennington to see about the monument. He told me it had not been given to him but two of the committees had accepted his design. His confidence in himself is something amazing to me. I wish I had half of it. I came to my room feeling somewhat better but still wretched enough. I am discouraged, almost terrified but I try to think much of it is owing to a physical disarrangement.