Thursday, Jan 1, 1885 It is many years since I spent New Year day in the city. I did not sleep well last night and awoke saddened and depressed. Poor Mary is in great trouble. Bessie her girl is sick and very difficult to manage. I arranged with Calvert at breakfast to meet him and Mr. Parsons at the Metropolitan museum to see the Watts pictures between 11 and 12. Coming over to my room I found letters from Emma Brace inviting me to Lorings wedding on the 14th, a note from Mr. Dunlap regarding the braid very encouraging in tone and a letter from Sara in which she tells me Uncle Maurices son had been there and told them his father had had a stroke of paralysis. She also told me that Joe has actually removed dear Gussies remains. This seems most cruel to all of us but there is nothing to do but quietly to submit. I cannot help feeling that it was done on his part to trouble us, that it is cruel, hasty and ill considered and that he will regret it. The new year dawns with plenty of troubles and somehow with less of heart, certainly with less of youth and vigor to meet them. I went up and met Calvert and Mr. Parsons at the museum and looked at the Watts pictures again carefully and I am more thoroughly impressed by them as embodying the very highest and noblest qualities of Art. My own work looks poor and feeble after contemplating these noble productions. I staid there more than an hour then walked down to 59th st and took the 6th Av. cars to my room. When I went over to dinner a little before 6 Calvert had not got home. I asked Mary about Bessie and she told me she had just gone to the hospital. Mary had had the doctor to see her. The disease seemed to be increasing and Bessie herself suggested going there. The doctor advised it and made the arrangements and it was all done. Poor Bessie. I think the Dr thought her in a dangerous condition and Mary was not strong enough to bear the strain and in their cramped quarters it was most fortunate that Bessie had the sense to see this was best for her. I felt very sorry for Mary who is much attached to Bessie and only wanted to do the best for her. I sincerely hope she will soon get well there for all this is wearing upon Mary with all her other anxieties.