Wednesday, Apr 7, 1880 Have had a feeling of great despondency today thinking constantly of dear Gertrude. Life seems worthless without her and I have such a sense of loneliness that it is almost insupportable. Every thing brings her to my mind and when I think of her all earthly interests vanish and I feel that it would be a blessed thing if I could go to her. I saw by a Brooklyn paper that Mr. Sawyer preached in Brooklyn on Sunday last. I have not seen him. I hope he will not return without my seeing him. I went to Julia Lilys wedding at the church at University place and Tenth St. this afternoon. Saw Jake Sharpe and Julia.