Went home Saturday by Wallkill Valley. Sunday I read Gertrudes letters and it seemed to me I missed her more than I ever have before. I could not seem to be resigned to her loss and I passed through an agony of grief. Before I left on Saturday I saw in the Tribune the following notice of Mrs. Holts death. She was a beautiful woman and I felt a new sense of loss in her death although I really seldom saw her. Gertrude admired her greatly and I love to think of them together on some immortal realm that we may dream of but not know. I could not but be very sad at home and I am afraid I distress them all with my trouble. Time I hope will bring me peace and perhaps other interests will have more attraction to me. I came down Monday by Hudson River road my father driving me over on the ice in a wagon. It was very warm and spring like and the ice cannot last long. I heard a dear little robin sing at home in the morning and Oh what a flood of sweet and sad and tender memories it brought to me. When I got in the train I found Major Wilkinson and Julia with their two children Rob & Emily on their way home from Hudson and in the seat with Julia a Mrs. Hoes (as I understood the name) & her husband with the Major. She was a very pretty interesting woman and I talked with her most of the way down. I dined at Whitelaw Reids with his neice, Mrs. Taylor & Lily & Stedman. Reid has a beautiful house and he showed me all over it. Mrs. Taylor & Lily went away early & Mr. Walter Phelps & his wife came in and a Mr. Boardman and we all went together to Cyrus Fields grand reception given on the 75th anniversary of the Atlantic Cable Co. There was a great crowd and crush. I saw Baker who asked me how my wife was. He seemed so shocked when I told him and it distressed me. Eastman, Gifford and I went around to the Century and smoked a cigar and it was past 1 o'clock when I got to bed. I came from home with a headache but in the afternoon I took a half bottle of champagne and stopped it so that I was able to go through the evening comfortably. I do not feel very bright this morning however.